A Comedy Cheer-Up for Migraine Sufferers

Occasionally, I ponder the great mysteries of life. For example, “Why does God allow pain in the world?” It is during those times I tend to develop migraine headaches.

Many people in the world suffer from migraines. It’s difficult to describe these uber-headaches to non-migraine sufferers, but I will try. Imagine you are sitting down, minding your own business, when suddenly your vision is filled with flashing lights that creates a weird fireworks display. It’s pretty. Then it feels like one of those fireworks flies off-course and hits you smack in the right temple. It hurts.

Then you feel nauseated. Then you feel confused and a bit disoriented. If I’m still not getting the point across, just imagine your first “couple’s-only” skate at the roller rink.

Pain medication helps – sort of. Salve would help a lightning burn I suppose.

Migraine headaches are one of the few ailments where you might feel better if you were hit by a car. Boom! “OH MY GOSH! ARE YOU ALL RIGHT!?” “Ah! Thaaaank youuuuuu!”

I tried all the prescription drugs to fight migraines. Prescription drugs help a little. Imitrex is a nice drug. But when I was in college, the only way you could take it was by injection. Not only was it in needle form, but the needle was placed in an intimidating self-injector gun that you had to “cock” first. It even made that familiar “chick-chick” sound.

Every time I had a headache I would prepare the self-injector — “chick-chick” – place it on my leg, put my thumb on the trigger, and then just stare at it for about an hour. Fortunately, at some point, a pain spasm in my head would cause my hand to flinch and accidentally squeeze the trigger. Poom!

Shots delivered into your system at 95 miles per hour are not pleasant. They tend to inflate your tissues. If you get stretch marks, it’s a bad shot.

Not that I didn’t have fun with the self-injector. I could load it up empty and hit the trigger, and it would still make that scary “poom” sound. In college, I was driving somewhere with my friend Chris, and he saw that I had the self-injector. He asked, “Does that thing hurt?” I said, “You tell me.” I cocked it empty, put it on his leg, and hit the trigger. Poom!

From his reaction, you wouldn’t think it was empty. His head hit the ceiling light. The poor guy got a migraine.

I want to give my fellow migraine sufferers a little hope here. I used to get migraines a couple times a week. It was awful. But I’m doing much better now and that is mostly due to taking supplements. You wouldn’t think supplements like magnesium oil or turmeric would help migraines, but for many people they do.

To find the right supplement to help your migraines, you have to do many experiments. But if you are diligent, and do some research, you will find a supplement that helps you.

Although they are not considered “supplements” by the health food industry, I am still working to find the right flavor of Lindt chocolate truffle that will cure a migraine. When I find it, I will spend a significant chunk of time every day fighting headaches.

Hang in there.